8 Tips to Help You Understand Your Toddler Better
- Written by Lilly Miller
Is your child just entering that celebrated but also dreaded toddler stage? From one to two years old, kids experience tremendous growth and many exciting and scary changes. They are learning new things, practicing walking, interacting with kids their own age, and learning more independence.
The most obvious change from babies to toddlers is the adorable babbling. When your kid is trying to tell you something and you’re failing to understand, it can be very frustrating for both of you. So how can you offer your toddler the support and help they need during this difficult time? Here are a few tips that will help you understand your toddler better:
Always stay close and calm
When you notice resistance from your toddler, it’s important to know that they are not defying you. Always stay calm in stressful situations and show your support. Even when your toddler pushes you away, they don’t really want to be left alone. You’re supposed to be their rock in this time of difficult transitions.
Maintain authority
No matter what it might look like to you, toddlers need discipline, limits, and authority. When navigating difficult situations, some parents try to hold their ground by any means while others give in completely. The best thing to do is to allow emotions and show that they have unconditional love even when misbehaving. While it’s important to show authority, pick your battles wisely. Surely you can’t let them choose your shopping list but you can let them press the elevator button.
Help with strong feelings
It might seem silly to you, but toddlers have many strong emotions and their inner lives are very complex. Between the ages of one and two, kids are starting to experience emotions like pride, guilt, shame, and embarrassment. Older toddlers behave similarly to teens, with their emotions going crazy. This is the time when toddlers also start developing certain personality traits like being more introverted or extroverted. Make sure to support your kid no matter if they are shy or outgoing. There are many good tips you can find on Kiindred that concern behaviour and development. Some of these tips advise parents to help kids with naming their feelings. For instance, you can point out certain emotions while reading a book or sharing your own emotions throughout the day. When toddlers can label their feelings, they will get much more control over them.
Ask them to show you things
Younger toddlers who didn’t acquire all the language skills might be struggling with communication, but make sure to be patient. Here’s a great tip: if they are trying to tell you something you don’t understand, ask them to show you. Often, they will point to something in the room and things will clear themselves up.
Take many guesses
There’s no way you’ll understand your child 100% of the time, even with pointing, so it’s okay to try to guess. Get down to their level and try to solve the puzzle together. Let’s say that the child is saying “hu, hu”. This might mean they are hungry or it could mean they want a hug. Don’t hesitate to take a guess, and if you make a mistake, take another guess.
Find a second translator
Sometimes, you will stay baffled by what your toddler is trying to communicate. When things get too confusing, you might just need to find a fresh set of ears to help you come up with an answer. For instance, if you have the other parent, grandparent, or nanny around, see if they can help you break the enigma. In most cases, you’ll get plenty of new guesses or solve the mystery right away.
Be honest with them
If you’re taking too long to understand your toddler (no matter if we’re talking about their communication skills or emotions), they can get frustrated, and for all the right reasons. In case that happens, make sure to explain your side of emotions as well by saying “I’m trying to help you, please be patient with me”. Showing them that you care about the conversation won’t remove all the frustration from the picture, but it will minimize it.
Listen to them
As a parent, you probably have certain hopes for your kids, and that’s normal. However, if you can’t separate your dreams from the reality of who your toddler is, it can be very stressful for all the parties involved. If you have too many demands, you can end up pushing your toddler into situations they don’t want to be in. The best thing you can do for your child is to ask yourself “Who is my toddler? What do they want to do?” In many cases, you’ll notice that they might be very different from you, and you should accept their individuality 100%.
Hopefully, with these tips up your sleeve, you can become a better parent to your toddler and offer them just the support they need to grow into happy and stable kids.
Daily Bulletin
